A note about my writing: it is not supposed to make sense.

At least not in the conditioned way of thinking. If you try to take these words and put them through a logic detector, you will miss the point in the true message at best; at worse you might make judgments that contribute to the suffering of our world. Careful now! I understand that, for some, this could create dissonance. It creates dissonance in a part me too! These words come through my heart in a body-felt experiences. My "engineer" brain wants to tear them apart, make sure every assertion has a scientific reference, button everything up so that I can be above reproach and any potential scrutiny from the world. My blessed brain is trying to keep me safe.

I write because I know these words are healing, I feel it in my bones. They help me step into being a more true version of myself. I know how to write strictly from a modern scientific standard, I've done it for most of my life. Conforming rigidly to logic won't help me become a more truthful, authentic version of myself. What I need, is truth with a capital "T". This kind of Truth always comes to us in the form of a paradox. Modern logic recognizes distinctions and opposites: right or wrong, good or bad, grief or happiness. If something is bad, it cannot be good. True Truth, however, exists in a different dimension through a trap door that exists somewhere in between two linear opposites; the truth of life that we find in death, the joy we can feel in loss, the sadness we can feel in gain. These are part of the true experiences that we have as humans. To deny them and pretend they don't exist because we can't back them up with a scientific reference is to deny our true nature and the essence of the earth herself. The shame perpetuated by society around expressing the more intangible experiences in life has lead to much trauma and suffering in the past. The shame stops here. There are infinite facets to our beings and to who we are. We do not have to be consistent or reconcile all of the parts of who we are with one another (and with scientific references.) We can be, express, and fully embody our humanness. Join me in the exploration <3